Tuesday, September 13, 2011

Chapter 46-Showdown

The rest of the wedding was a blur but I managed to make it through without breaking down into tears.  I couldn't look at my father for rest of the night.

Aric and Nina were staying at a hotel for the night so the car ride back was filled with my mom and CeCe chatting about the wedding. 
"Honey are you ok?"
"Yes mom.  I'm just tired.  It's been a long day."
"Yes it has, but I'm so glad we got to see it.  It was an absolutely amazing ceremony."
We arrived home and I headed upstairs to take a nice long bath.  Once in the privacy of my room I buried my face in my pillow and let the flood gates open.
I cried until I couldn't cry anymore.  I was hoping I would be tired but I couldn't sleep still.  It was late and I shouldn't call him but I needed to talk to someone.  I could only hope that he wouldn't be mad.

"Hello"  his voice was groggy and I knew I had awakened him.
"Hey, it's me."
"Hey beautiful, it's always great to hear your voice but I'm a little far away for a late night rendezvous."  Even in the wee hours of the morning he found time to flirt.
I couldn't help myself and broke down in tears again.
"What's wrong Amari?"  he sounded much more awake now.
"I just needed to hear a friendly voice." I replied between my sobs. "I'm sorry for calling so late.  You probably have work tomorrow.""Don't worry about it.  That's what they invented coffee for."
Marcus stayed on the phone and talked to me.  We didn't discuss why I was upset.  He tried but every time he did I started to cry again.  So he talked and I listened.  We discussed his job, and sports, and even the weather.  It was nice to listen to his voice and not feel so alone.  It was almost 4am.
"I should let you try and get a little sleep.  Thanks for staying up with me."
"Anything for you beautiful.  Are you going to be ok?"
"I'll have to be."  With that we hung up.  I still couldn't sleep so I got dressed and went to sit by the pool.  Watching the sun rise over the horizon was a lovely sight.  I marveled in the beauty of the new day until I heard the patio door open.
"Good morning dad.  Did you sleep well?"
"Yes any reason I shouldn't?"
"I don't know.  Maybe your guilty conscience."
He didn't reply.  He seemed void of any of the guilt and shame I thought I saw last night.
"How could you?  How could you just hand me over as if I were unimportant?  I'm your daughter damn-it not some baseball trading card!"
"So would you rather I had left your mother?  Did you stop to think what that would have done to her?"
"Cut the crap!  It wasn't about what it would have done to mom it was about what you wanted."
"That's not true!"
"Yes it is.  You didn't want Marisol to have your child so you made her get rid of it.  You didn't want to stay with her any longer so you just left her.  You didn't want to be away from mom so you gave me up instead!  What do you think it will do to mom to know you handed over her daughter to be turned into a fucking baby factory!"
The sting I felt on my cheek stunned me.  I had never been hit before.  The emotional pain and humiliation wasn't enough now he had resorted to physical violence.
"Amari, I'm sorry.  I didn't mean to."  He tried to touch me but I backed away still holding my cheek.
"I didn't know what she was going to do.  I swear I had no idea."
"It doesn't matter if you knew or not.  You were my father and it's your job to protect me from harm not hand me over to it."
"Do you know she claims to have killed my sister?"
"Yes.  She wanted you both and she wanted your mom to know what it was like to lose a child.  She spared you because I asked her to.  I saved your life."

He sounded almost proud of that, like what he did deserved a reward.  This man was incapable of real love.  Anyone that could be so callus about the lives of his children couldn't have a heart to love another soul.
"You knew she killed my sister and you were going to just sit back and watch as she turned me into a whore!"
"Do you think this has been easy for me?  Do you think knowing the fact that I was responsible for the death of my child meant nothing to me?"
"Hell yes I do think it's been easy for you.  Mom suffered over Amella's death, I suffered over the loss of my sister my best friend and I am continuing to suffer because of you!"
"I did suffer Amari and I am suffering as much as you right now."
I let out a sarcastic laugh.  He had some audacity to look me in the face and tell me he's suffering.
"You don't know what suffering is.  At least tell me this.  Why 100 kids?  You have to know why."
"I would guess because that's about how long it's been since she lost hers and she wanted me to know that she has never forgotten how much that loss meant to her."
"Of course.  I still don't understand her logic or yours.  I had the misfortune of being born to you and I am being punished for that.  Mom had the misfortune of attracting your attention and she was punished for that even if she doesn't know it.  She should know what kind of a man she has dedicated her life to."
"You wouldn't dare tell her."
"No you should."
"Why would I do that when everything I've done and sacrificed has been to keep her from being hurt."
"You never loved either of us did you?"
"I do love you.  You were always my favorite and now I've lost you."
"You didn't lose me George.  You gave me away. And the only reason I won't say anything to mom is because I couldn't live with myself knowing I gave her the knowledge that would cause her so much pain."
"If there were anything I could do to change what is happening."
"There was you just didn't want to sacrifice your happiness so you sacrificed mine instead.  After this trip I don't ever want to see you again.  Don't call me, don't ask about me, and don't pretend to care about me.  You are dead to me from this moment."
"Don't you think that is a bit extreme?"
"No extreme would be throwing you over the balcony. But since I don't want your death on my hands I will refrain from doing that."

Mom walked out looking refreshed. I was sad that she was in the dark about everything.  This would probably be the last time I saw her because there was no way I explain any more grandchildren to her.  I was going to lose my mother as well.
"Are you two still fighting?"
"No mom.  There's no more fight in me."

21 comments:

  1. O.O
    I hate her dad so much right now. -_-

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  2. Wow! An influx of gripping chapters from you tonight! George really is an ass, completely heartless. And i think Marcus has grown on me, he's so uncomplicated and caring, i think it's just what she needs :)

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  3. Yeah I had them written I just needed to do the pictures. George is a real ass can you imagine how ruthless he would have been as a vamp. Marcus is just what she needs right now but it will be a little hard to explain her current situation to him.

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  4. I had tears in my eyes when Amari cried!

    I wanted to choke her father when I read that he had given up Amari to be used by Marisol!
    I don't see how she could ever forgive him for that! Actually, he doesn't even seem really sorry!

    Your story is really well-written, Jazen!
    I can't wait for more!

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  5. Awww, so sad! :( Poor Amari! I can't believe her dad did that to her! Great job!

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  6. I swear I'm going to throw this computer through a wall right now... but it's not the computer I'm mad at, it's George! I wish there was a way for Amari's mother to find out about everything without getting hurt but that's just not possible is it? And if Amari could keep Marcus I'd be ecstatic for her!!! <3
    Also, I wanted to thank you for responding to my comments! :) You're amazing!!!
    G'nite!

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  7. Daisy
    Sorry didn't mean to make you cry. He was pretty heartless. She has had to endure a lot but with the additional info she learned about her dad and the way Mulo was a complete ass to her she couldn't hold it back any more. Plus her hormones don't help even if she hasn't quite realized she knocked up again.

    Jobug
    Yeah he is pretty heartless for sure. I do have some happy time planned for her soon. I think I have put her through a lot lately.

    Maddy
    Don't damage your computer LOL however would you read the rest of my story :). George has turned out to be even worse than Marisol if that was even possible. I don't think there is a real way for her mom to find out without being hurt in the process but he has to lose something. I just haven't figured out what or how yet.

    No thanks necessary for me responding. If you are kind enough to read and comment on my story the very least I can do to show my appreciation is to reply. Thanks so much for reading.

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  8. Wow. What a telling, emotional dialogue. I'm so sad for all of them, sad for Amari for having to take all the shit, not only from Mulo, but from her father and Marisol also.

    Sad for George, for hurting his daughter to such a point she'd declare him dead to her. A part of me feels he deserves it, and another part feels things should never have gotten to a point where Amari had to say those words.

    But mostly I'm sad for Amari's mom. She has no idea who she married. Maybe she does, you know what they say about women and intuition. But being kept in the dark like this by people who are supposed to love her will not look if and when the truth comes out. It always does.

    What a wonderful, gripping dialogue!

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  9. I know she can't seem to have a good occasion without something going wrong. Mulo acted like a brat, her dad is full of lies and secrets and Marisol is just plan evil. Her mom is in the dark about all of it. I haven't decided yet whether she will learn the truth or not but I think George needs to have some sort of punishment. There was a lot that needed to be said in that last chapter emotions were running high. Amari has certainly been dealt a bad hand in life.

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  10. I so feel for her. her life is one negative emotional roller coaster. I hate her dad and I agree with Val about her mother. I also feel for her. If she ever finds out she will be devastated. Great chapter jazen!

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  11. Thanks Dutchy

    I know she just can't seem to catch a break. I am planning on trying to bring a little happiness to her. At least for a little while. It's time she doesn't have to feel so defeated. The mom would be devastated if she knew what was going on.

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  12. Poor thing. Her dad is a douche. Ugh I'd could gladly have pushed her dad off the balconey for her. What a horrible person.

    Trying to keep everything from her mum too, I understand why she has concern for her mums feelings, but you gotta wonder what's better. Her mum is probably going to be really hurt anyway when her daughter loses contact trying to hide everything. Especially when she's already lost a child that she won't ever get back.

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  13. Dreamerz
    She'll still talk to her mom but probably won't have any more visits. Telling her about the first 3 children was hard enough. She thinks she is sparing her from the pain but never seeing her remaining child again might just be worse.

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  14. Another amazing chapter! I can't stand her dad! I think she should tell her mom! Then her mom can dump her dad and help her raise the kids! I suppose that would be a little weird to live with your mother during a 100 baby challenge, though :P

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  15. Crzy
    Thanks for getting all caught up. I am still working on whether or not I want her mom to find out. As for her issues with Ceula what made it worse is that she didn't see it coming.

    And Mulo without a shirt on is never a bad thing (unless you are Amari LOL)

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  16. Oh wow! It just keeps getting better. I can't believe her dad would do something like that!

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  17. Her Dad is a major cockmunch and she should have nutpunched him! No way in hell would he have hit me like that after all the other shit he put her through and then get to walk away. He'd have been crawling, hobbling and getting carried out on a fucking stretcher!

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  18. Oh hell no! That mofo needs to die. You don't come into anybody's home and get physical oh no no no, especially after what he's done to her. I would have kicked his wrinkled backside right into the pool and watched him bubbly like My Darling Clementine.

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  19. Wow! George is seriously messed up to be able to do that to his own kids.

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    Replies
    1. Yep, he's a cold hearted bastard for sure. :(

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