Chapter 61-Sex, Lies, and Marriage

I'm sure most men wouldn't do what I have done.  Most men wouldn't be confident enough or crazy enough to propose to let alone marry a woman that was in love with someone else.  I've known since that day I showed up here she was in love with that guy even if she didn't want to admit it to me.  I could see it on her face in and in her body when she spoke of him.  I suspect that's why she would try not to as much as possible.
That love couldn't be hidden when he showed up at the wedding.  Everything about her changed with the simple sound of his voice, then watching them on the dance floor made it even more evident.  Most men would have walked away or caused a scene but I am not most men.  I don't doubt she loves me, it's just not in the same way.  We can't always get a fairytale ending but will all things considered, this was close enough for me.  She was my wife.  I've loved Amari for as long as I could remember.  When she left, she took a piece of me with her and I couldn't fully commit to anyone else for that very reason.  The day she came back into my life I took that as a sign.  Our first night together was everything I imagined it would be and it resulted in her giving me two amazing boys.  Finding out she was pregnant by me was a shock, but it was news that made me happier than I ever dreamed possible.
Marriage is supposed to be based on honesty, love, and respect.  We have the the love and respect covered, but when it comes to honesty there is work to be done.  I look at her and she keeps a smile on her face however when she doesn't think I'm looking I know her mind drifts to a different place.  There is more she is hiding from me, she pretends there isn't and I pretend not to notice.  Pushing her for more isn't really an option when I am just as guilty as she is with holding things back.  I know I need to tell her and at some point I will, there won't be a choice.  Until that time comes I am going to enjoy my life, my family living as if everything is as it should be.

My eyes fluttered open and they were met with the loving smile of my husband.  That word is still foreign to me.
"Why are you watching me sleep?"
"Because you are beautiful." he leaned and gave me a loving kiss on my forehead.
"You're just saying that because I finally agreed to the demands." I replied playfully.
"That may be true as well.  You know I haven't heard the boys yet.  We might have time for..." he trailed off as he moved on top of me.

"Well we are still newlyweds."

"Mom hurry up.  All the best ones will be gone."  Dunham yelled through the door.
Marcus and I were taking the boys to the animal shelter today.  I had finally caved to the peer pressure and agreed to getting them a pet.  Being the only woman in the house I was out numbered and the three of them worked well as a team against me.  I would have been done by now if Marcus hadn't joined me in the shower for round two of the morning.  He's been almost insatiable.  The first few days I thought it was just carry over from the wedding, however now almost two months later he was still going strong.
"Sorry guys.  I'm ready."
"Mom you're such a girl you take forever." Dax complained.

We all piled into the car and headed downtown.  Two hours and almost three hundred dollars later, we returned home with not one but two new pets and all the stuff they need.  Somehow I allowed myself to be talked into two dogs.  Dunham saw Fred and fell in love with him.  The shelter worker started talking to Marcus and I about how he and his mate Wilma were dropped off by their owners because they no longer wanted them.  It was heartbreaking, and when the three of them learned of Wilma I had three sets of gorgeous green eyes all pleading with me to say yes to her as well.

We were now the proud owners of two three year old Weimaraners.  I had my reservations still, but Marcus assured me this would teach the boys responsibility.
They were so excited when I agreed and then went over board at the pet store buying all the supplies, beds, toys, a dog house.  It all added up quickly but seeing their happy faces was well worth it.

"Thank you."
"For what?"
"For saying yes to both dogs.  I know you were on the fence still, and wanted a small dog."
Smiling I looked over at the boys brushing away. "With the way the three of you ganged up on me, how could I refuse."

Marcus pulled me into an embrace.  I knew the look in his eyes before he even spoke.  "You know the boys will be busy for a little while.  I think we could sneak away for a few minutes."
"That will be the third time today." I whispered
He just winked at me as he took my hand and led me to our room. 

Laying on the bed I watched as he got re dressed.
"Enjoying the show?" he asked
"Most certainly."
"Now that the house in Riverview has sold we should look into buying a place instead of continuing to pay rent here."

He sat down next to me on the bed and I changed positions to face him.
"I like it here.  Couldn't we just re decorate instead?"
"You want to put money into re doing a house that isn't ours?  That doesn't make good business sense Amari."
His phone started buzzing before I could reply.  Marcus' whole body changed when he looked at the caller id.

He walked out of the room without saying a word to me before he answered it.  I heard the soft clicking of his office door closing.  He had never left the room to take a call before.  I guess whatever was going on at work must have been really important.  I rolled off the bed to redress.  I needed to check on the boys but I heard them and the dogs running around the living room.  I stepped over to my dresser, pausing to listen for Marcus before digging the papers from the back of my drawer.

Running my hand across them I gingerly fingered the note that was attached to them.

A present for you and your new husband

~M

They arrived in the mail about 2 weeks after the wedding.  The moment I read them it all made sense as to why the rent for this place was so low.  He owned the house.  He wasn't going to let me be on my own even after I moved out of the first house he had bought for me.  I was now the proud owner of not one but two homes he had given me.  All the money I had paid in rent was funneled back into the original account he had set up for me.  We lived in his house, we drove his car.  I needed to tell Marcus the real reason I didn't want to move but I knew it would only cause him to be angry and want to move even more.  I replaced the papers before walking into the bathroom.  I made sure to lock the door before pulling out my phone.

"Hello." just hearing his voice gave me feelings of excitement and guilt.

"Hi.  I um wanted to talk to CeCe."

I swear I could almost see the smile on his face when he spoke.

"If that were true you wouldn't call at an hour that's so late here and you would have called her phone and not mine."  I gnawed on my lower lip not wanting to admit to myself that what he said was true.

 "You don't have to make up excuses to talk to me.  I do have your daughter, that alone should give you a plausible explanation for your husband."

Ignoring the goosebumps that were on my arms, I continued on.  "How is she?"

"She doesn't remember him or anything he did to her."  All of the playfulness was drained from his voice.

"What about the baby."

"As much as it disgusts me to see her growing with his child, it's still there.  She believes she is a surrogate for a couple here in France.  She doesn't know she's it's mother."

The feelings of guilt hit me again.  The thought of what she went through because of me then having to have her not know the existence of her own child.  I was a terrible mother for allowing that as well, but I couldn't bear the thought that she would have to live with those memories.

"Thank you again for agreeing to do that."

"No need to thank me.  I didn't want her to remember and I would have done it even without you asking."

In the background I heard a woman's voice calling him back to bed.  As irrational as it sounds, jealously hit me like a ton of bricks.  I knew he wouldn't be sitting around waiting for me but knowing he was with someone other than me made me angry, and hurt.

"I need to go attend to my guest."  His playful tone had returned.  I wondered if he knew what that knowledge did to me best guess was he did.

"Mulo, the news says David is missing.  Did you have anything to do with that?"

My question was met with silence.

"Goodnight my love." then he disconnected the call.

Taking a few deep breaths to steady my nerves, I exited the room in search of my family.

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I volunteer with a Weimaraner rescue and had to have them in my game.