I wanted to meet the kids but Amari
wouldn’t allow it. She said it wasn’t fair to put them through what she’s
dealing with especially the triplets. She briefly explained to me what she had
been going through with them. Not only had she raised two somewhat rebellious
twins, she was now faced with doing so with triplets. My heart went out to her
with all the stuff she shouldered and managed to keep going. I finally saw
things her way and agreed it was best that they not be involved right now. I
had things I needed to sort out and until I made a decision on how to handle this I would stay away from my children. Even if it pained me to do so. Now
as I headed back home, I struggled with what I would tell Florence. Having the
wife I think she could handle since I obviously had no clue about any of this,
but telling her I had children already when she wanted to be the one to give me
that. That conversation was going to be harder.
As I pulled into the drive, Florence
came out to greet me. She jumped into my arms, showering me with kisses.
“Mi sei mancato.” (I’ve missed
you.) She exclaimed holding on to me tightly.
It was almost as if she knew our
upcoming conversation wasn’t going to be pleasant. I had already explained to
her that I had in fact located the mystery woman but I didn’t want to talk
about everything over the phone and being so far away. I know that didn’t help
ease her fears but I thought that it was a conversation best done in person.
“Odio stare in questa grande casa
vuota da solo.” (I hate being in this big empty house alone).
My arms tighten around her slender
waist. Her smell, one that I have known for so long, now seemed strange. The
kiss I shared with Amari flashed through my mind. It was brief, but it was
enough to let me know she wasn’t some stranger like she wanted me to believe. I remembered the feel of her body pressed against mine, the sweet taste of her lips, all of it was very familiar and felt very right in that moment. I
pulled free of Florence, reaching into the car to get my bag. I was here with one woman, but thinking of another. It was wrong and I felt guilty doing so.
“Hai fame?” (Are you hungry) She
asked taking my hand and giving me a hopeful look as we walked towards the
house.
“No, I’m fine.” I replied seeing
the look of disappointment that flashed across her face.
